mmerriam | Report From The Field...

The scrabbling noise was our neighbor lady chewing through the ceiling.

She was a nice old lady, the kind who likely made cookies for her grandchildren on Sunday and brought hot dish over when someone passed away. It's too bad...

Once we realized they'd broken through the attic firewall between units, we knew there was no way to hold the upstairs. We tied a note to Selena's tail and lowered her out the window. She vanished into the darkness in search of help.

careswen and I decided to make a break for it. We loaded up water, weapons, pizza, and the laptop and we charged down the stairs. It was touch and go for awhile: the zombies were coming faster than I could reload and

careswen can only be expected to swing a sword for so long. It looked like we might be overrun.

That's when the squirrels showed up.

I had always wondered about my wife, after that bite she received back in college.

I married a Were-Squirrel.

But you know, an army of squirrels is still an army. We made it clear and dashed down to Nine-Mile creek, using the foliage for cover. That Fuchsia-haired Zombie-Queen was on our tails and for a moment I thought we might have to turn and fight, but she stopped at the water's edge. We found an abandoned Caribou Coffee (with free wifi) and we've hunkered down. The squirrels are on the perimeter. We have coffee, tea, muffins, and scones. In the distance Eden Prairie is burning. Sporadic gunfire reaches our ears and there is the distinct sound of helicopters overhead...