Adventures In Blindness, Episode #586
Aug. 6th, 2007 01:26 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
mmerriamTo the outside world, I don't always "present" as blind. For instance, when I'm visiting the homes of my friends, I rarely use my cane to navigate, at least after the first couple of visits. Once I've spent some time at their homes, I usually have it memorized and can move about without too much difficulty. I just need to be alert for small moving objects such as children and pets as I walk slowly and carefully.
In public it is another matter. I need to be highly aware of my surroundings, keep my senses alert, and use the cane. Maintaining any semblance of independence depends on my using my training constantly. If I want any freedom in my life, at least when dealing with the outside world, I have to work at it.
Sometimes it's not enough.
Last week I was in the grocery store in downtown Hopkins. I kept veering off into things and one point there was a small collision with an end-cap that resulted in it tipping precariously. Fortunately, nothing was knocked over and nothing was broken. The end result was me standing there, frozen in place.
I could have asked for help. The store is required to provide me with assistance if I need it, but I hate asking. I admit that I'm one of those people who, if you found me at the bottom of a well, my arm caught in a bear-trap, sinking in quicksand, I'd tell you I'm fine. I hate asking for help.
Instead, the floor manager came over and asked if I needed any help. There was nothing for it: I did, and that was that. I ended up with a nice young lady--who turned out to be the manager's daughter--helping me find my groceries. She was good about it, friendly and funny, and helped me find everything I needed. She even helped me find a couple of things I wanted and didn't know they had, like hushpuppy mix.
On the one hand, it was nice to have the help, to have someone go around with me and find the items I needed and to, well, make sure I didn't wreck the store. There was, truthfully, a bit of relief involved.
On the other hand, it was another piece of lost independence. It was another thing I have to let go. It was another adjustment, one I'm not sure how I feel about.
In Peace,
Michael
In public it is another matter. I need to be highly aware of my surroundings, keep my senses alert, and use the cane. Maintaining any semblance of independence depends on my using my training constantly. If I want any freedom in my life, at least when dealing with the outside world, I have to work at it.
Sometimes it's not enough.
Last week I was in the grocery store in downtown Hopkins. I kept veering off into things and one point there was a small collision with an end-cap that resulted in it tipping precariously. Fortunately, nothing was knocked over and nothing was broken. The end result was me standing there, frozen in place.
I could have asked for help. The store is required to provide me with assistance if I need it, but I hate asking. I admit that I'm one of those people who, if you found me at the bottom of a well, my arm caught in a bear-trap, sinking in quicksand, I'd tell you I'm fine. I hate asking for help.
Instead, the floor manager came over and asked if I needed any help. There was nothing for it: I did, and that was that. I ended up with a nice young lady--who turned out to be the manager's daughter--helping me find my groceries. She was good about it, friendly and funny, and helped me find everything I needed. She even helped me find a couple of things I wanted and didn't know they had, like hushpuppy mix.
On the one hand, it was nice to have the help, to have someone go around with me and find the items I needed and to, well, make sure I didn't wreck the store. There was, truthfully, a bit of relief involved.
On the other hand, it was another piece of lost independence. It was another thing I have to let go. It was another adjustment, one I'm not sure how I feel about.
In Peace,
Michael
